Reasons Why
by HeatherGrey07
Summary: The pain came from the dialogue inside her head, words that reminded her how worthless the situation made her feel. But the worst part about the whole thing was her inability to stop it, just like how she felt helpless to stop her own sexual assault. It was until one day, admits one of her many pointless Diagon Alley trips, that an idea came to Nymphadora Tonks.


I'm back for the Quidditch league forum round nine story, with prompts "rich" and "Nothing more complicated than learning lines and putting on a costume. - Morgan Freeman!" For this round about women I decided to write a story that is all too common. With 62% of all sexual assault victims in America having had some sort of drugs in their system when the incident occurred (US Department of Justice). This has thankfully never happened to me, but I know this story is echoed by many women across the world. And so when I was writing it I wanted to capture that kind of emotion, and I hoped I did it right. Please leave your comments and favorites on the story, I love hearing your opinions!

—-

When people asked Nymphadora Tonks why she wanted to be an Auror, she never knew how to answer.

She could give them the acceptable one, that as a child she always wanted to help people live happy and healthy lives. Or she could give them the actual answer, that her sexual assault inspired her to help defeat people's personal demons all over the world. People usually like the first one much better, or do they?

—-

It happened about 10 years ago, when Tonks was freshly out of Howarts and unsure what she wanted to do with the rest of her life. But just thought she would party and have fun until she figured it out.

It wasn't until a little less than a year later of that lifestyle that she met her match, and it came in the form of a 20 year old that was only a year older than her during school.

He was a rich, entitled Ravenclaw with sandy blonde hair and emerald green eyes. The kind of eyes someone might get lost in, and in between the shots and straight liquor she surely did. But when he took her hand and offered her a chance to go back to a private room, she declined. Having just told him that she wanted to head home, it was 2 in the morning after all. But he insisted, and Tonks still continued to decline.

She didn't decline one thing though, and that was for him to get her a new drink. But when he did, she never would've guess a strong, deadly version of a lust potion would be slipped inside. One that causes the victim to pass out in an aroused state for a couple of hours. And so she drank whatever was in her cup, and doesn't remember anything until she woke up the next morning naked, with bruises all over her body, and next to the boy she had met the night before. He was also wearing nothing, but the girl didn't stay long to make sure.

She just jumped out of the bed and ran out of the room, only stopping to grab her clothes. She didn't even bother to put it on until she had gotten almost out the door. But she didn't cry, and she wouldn't for a long time

—-

Days after the event were hard, but not outwardly so. The pain came from the dialogue inside her head, words that reminded her how worthless the situation made her feel. But the worst part about the whole thing was her inability to stop it, just like how she felt helpless to stop her own sexual assault. It was until one day, admits one of her many pointless Diagon Alley trips, that an idea came to her. She was just walking when she suddenly stopped, hands going up to hold her face. "Oh my gosh." She muttered. Why hadn't she thought of it sooner? The only career she could do to never feel helpless again was an Auror, because that was the only career that she could truly help others.

—-

Weeks later, when the girl got her application for the Auror program, she lied. She wrote down that the reason she wanted to attend the program was because as child she dreamed of protecting others. Which was kind of true, but she never mentioned her rape or the aftermath. She believed it to be too much, and turned in her application thinking it wasn't going to m make the cut

But, to her surprise, she got a letter a week later saying she should interview for the program. This shocked her in many aspects. One, was that she was still in the running. She was convinced that she was never going to make it past the first round. Two was that she got an interview, they never usually did that. No Auror she had ever talked to had gotten an interview, and she didn't intend to be the first. Yet, when the day came around, Tonks found herself at the doorway of one of the most famed Aurors, Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody.

And he was exactly as frightening as she originally thought, with a weird eye that Tonks knew was just reading her mind, and she didn't like it. "Miss Tonks." He addressed as she walked through the door, not even bothering to stand up and great her.

"Mr. Moody." She replied back, holding out her hand for him to shake. He just grunted at the action, shifting in his seat and scratching his lower back. Causing only a second of a frown to appear on her face as she pulled her hand back, and he just laughed while he gestured to the empty chair from across from him. She sat down, and the interview continued like normal.

It was a standard set of questions, mostly about describing oneself or how she would react in certain situations. Tonks responded admirably, and Moody seemed like he could care less. Instead choosing to stare off into space and to almost fall asleep numerous times. It wasn't until a snore escaped his mouth that Tonks bothered to inquire what is happening. "Sir," she began, "if you don't mind me asking, why am I here if you are just going to fall asleep?"

He gave her a weird smile made of scars. "Look, Miss Tonks, your application sucked. There is no way around it, because it truly did."

The young woman giggled at his word, "I didn't expect people to like it very much, that's for certain."

Moody chose to ignore her comment, instead just continuing to speak. "Everyone else in the department thought I should not even give you a chance. After all, your supplication makes it seem like you don't care very much about the program. But, I knew that was a lie. So, despite everyone's disapproval, I am going to give you one more chance. All you have to do is tell me, honestly, why you want to be an Auror."

She gulped, her mouth suddenly becoming quite dry. "I put it on the application, I only dreamed of being an Auror as a child." She said under her breath.

"Well now I am getting impatient Miss Tonks, please tell me why you are sitting in front of me. I won't judge, I promise you I won't."

Tonks took a deep breath, "Are you sure? I mean…It's bad…and I don't know if you would like to hear it. I haven't told anyone before."

"Try me." He said simply, and that was all the girl needed before starting to speak, and she told him everything. Tears, for the first time, falling down her face. From the beginning of the party, to being drugged, to waking up, and to feeling so helpless. Then she told him about the moment in Diagon Alley when she realized what she could do about it. And that was why she was sitting in front of him, pleading for a place in.

—-

A week later Nymphadora Tonks got a letter, and it only said one thing.

"Nothing more complicated than learning lines and putting on a costume, even if it is just metaphorical. Training starts on Monday. -Alastor Moody"


End file.
